MY TINY WARDROBE BLOG & PRESS

Archie's Fight

Posted on February 20, 2016 by Amy Goller | 0 comments

Archie is 2 years old from Newcastle NSW, Australia and has recently been diagnosed with Acute Flaccid Myelitis and Anterior Horn Cell Disease. Archie has spent the last few months in the Intensive Care Unit at John Hunter Hospital in Newcastle.

Acute flaccid myelitis (AFM) is a condition that affects the nervous system, specifically the spinal cord, which can result from a variety of causes including viral infections.

This disease has only been seen in Australia TWICE before Archie's diagnosis and his is the most severe case they have seen. This disease has caused paralysis in Archie's right arm, both legs and his chest. Archie has been ventilated since his admission in November and only last week underwent a tracheostomy. There is currently no cure for Acute Flaccid Myelitis and therefore Doctor's are relying on information from around the world through other cases of this disease to work out a treatment plan.
Acute Flaccid Myelitis Blog about the illness in children
Archie's Mum Chloe

Anterior horn disease: Any of a group of diseases that affect the anterior horn cells which make up part of the spinal cord. The anterior horn contains motor neurons which primarily affect the axial muscles. 

With a long road ahead of him Archie has daily therapy sessions and is improving everyday!! With these 2 disease's being so rare it is unclear how long Archie's full recovery will take but it is expected to take months/years.
Acute Flaccid Myelitis Information For Parents

Archie's parents Chloe and Alex have been by his side everyday and have recently had to return to work.

Archie's Mother, Chloe, has started a blog that gives you more of an insight into the first few days of Archie's hospital stay: https://archiesfight.wordpress.com/

Please go to: 

Instagram: @archiesfight

 

Posted in Acute Flaccid Myelitis, Brave Parents Fight for Their Son, Diseases in Children

The Moments When You Realise You’re a Mother of Two

Posted on February 14, 2016 by Amy Goller | 0 comments

A month ago I gave birth to a beautiful baby boy – what a little champ he is! He has an adoring big sister, a superhero daddy, and we are now a family of four. That makes me a mother of two. It’s taken a while for this new label to sink in. No longer is my daughter the centre of my world or can claim my full attention 100% of the time. There’s another little person now who relies on me for absolutely everything.

These are the moments I’ve experienced, some that broke my heart and some that melted my heart, and some are just moments…

The moment when your child walks into the hospital room to meet her baby brother and it feels like she’s grown a whole year over night.

That moment when she cries uncontrollably because she wants to stay home with you.

That moment when she tells you she misses you when you were in hospital.

That moment when you realise you have mastitis on day 5 and feel like you've been hit by a bus.

That moment when your husband says he'd like to go for a bike ride and you burst into tears because you realise he's been doing so much to take care of all three of you. 

Those moments when both children conspire again you and cry at the same time.

That moment when you ask what her favourite activity with her grandparent was and she says "when daddy came home". 

That moment when the new baby sleeps peacefully in his big sisters arms.

Those moments when she helps and brings things the baby needs for bath or nappy change time.

That moment when you see the baby settle in his daddy’s arms.

That moment when she sings to him 'twinkle twinkle ' and 'abc' or reads him a book.

That moment when you collapse on the couch when both kids are asleep.

That moment when you get to leave the house for the first time.

Those moments when you’re able to pick up toys off the floor again as opposed to when you were heavily pregnant.

The moments when you try your best to keep up with the dishes and washing but it never lasts long.

The moment when you just try and make it from one feed to the next, and one day to the next...and you soak up those days before your other half goes back to work.

The moment when you learn how to manage the capsule + pram + baby + toddler all by yourself.

That moment when you think you’re supermum taking the kids to the park until you get attacked my mozzies and make a mad dash home.

Those moments at 5am when you are praying that the baby’s cries don’t wake up the toddler!

The moment when she says to the baby “I missed you when you were in mummy’s tummy”.

"It's holding one person's hand, while making room for two others (when we only have two hands); its finding time to be an 'us', and to be a 'mom' and a 'dad' and an individual too." – 

Jennifer S.White - "The hardest part of being a parent" - Huffington Post 

THAT MOMENT YOU REALISE YOU CAN DO IT.

Blog the moment you realise you are a mother of two

Lauren Hunt is a mummy + teacher blogger at www.teachertypes.com

Instagram: @teacher_types

Facebook: www.facebook.com/teachertypes/

(link to quote at the end of the article = http://www.huffingtonpost.com/jennifer-s-white/the-hardest-part-of-being-a-parent_b_8881186.html)

Posted in How having a Second Baby Changed Life, Mother of Two, Motherhood

FEATURE: Brave Mumma In My Family

Posted on February 08, 2016 by Amy Goller | 0 comments

Brave Mama in My Family Story #4 - Amy Iles Goller

I was extremely humbled to be asked to be interviewed about my motherhood journey, how I became a small business owner, my everyday battle with Fibromyalgia and what I think BRAVE means. Happy Reading xx Amy

My Tiny Wardrobe Founder www.mytinywardrobe.com.au Brave Mumma In My Family

In our #BraveMamainmyfamily interview series, we speak with Amy from My Tiny Wardrobe. Although I've not met her personally, my first impression of her when I first met her on IG was that she is such an authentic mum. One that if I met at the playground, I would have been able to chat with, and have coffee together, and more play dates afterwards. Amy has a heart to support mums, whether in business or in their motherhood journey. And this shines through so brightly when she's interacting with people on IG and on her blog. So I'm really excited to have her join us in our Brave Mama in My Family community.

In this interview, Amy shares with us her brave moments, and her story. She is a very strong woman and her story deeply inspired me.  I hope you will be encouraged and uplifted through her very real, and tough but inspiring moments in her journey.

 Amy Goller_Brave mama in my family_picture 1

1. Tell us about yourself, where you are based and a little about your little one(s). 

Hi, I'm Amy, ‘A’ to my friends, Mummy to my two year old, my 7 month old just screams and I jump and my husband calls me ‘Smallie' as Im only 5’5. Nothing a pair of stilettos can’t fix (Not that I have worn a pair in the last two years #mumlife, I now live in flats and converse). I have lived in the eastern suburbs of Sydney for the majority of my life but have also lived in FNQ and Perth for extended periods. I have two gorgeous girls, Olivia and Chloe, both under the age of two and I am truly blessed to have had them.

My husband and I, like many couples tried unsuccessfully to have children for 4 years. We did everything. Visited a plethora of doctors, specialists, had invasive tests, tried numerous IVF clinics, attended acupuncture sessions religiously, changed diets, constantly googled and ramped up our exercise regime. After 3 years, we were told we had “unexplained infertility” and that continuing IVF was our best hope. So that is what we did. We kept trying, but told no one apart from our family. As a women I was naive and believed that you fell in love, got married, went on your honeymoon and had babies. I think I had watched too many movies. Although in hindsight, at the same time I was going through IVF, 40 % of my friends were too, yet we never told each other. I feel sad looking back, but that is why I am very open now about raising awareness of issues I think mothers and fathers, women and men would want to know about, but it may not be talked about openly. I do this through my fortnightly blogs @mytinywardrobesydney. It's my passion to try and make a difference. 

I always knew I wanted to be a mother. So I was desperate to have children. My husband also wanted children, but as a man I don't think he felt the same anxiety as I did. After all it was my body that was to be the vessel for a little bub. The IVF process was hard. Physically. Emotionally. And it was hard for our relationship too, but at the end of the day, after what seemed like a million embryo transfers, we had our daughter Chloe. The day the Clinic called me with my blood test results, I cried of happiness in the fire escape at work and I tricked my hubbie. Cheeky I know. I had told him it had failed again, but when he came home I handed him a bottle of wine with a sticker I had written on it saying “Lets Celebrate…You are going to be a dad”! He still has that bottle of Wine. Empty, but he has the memory. 

Soon after that, 11 months to the day, we fell pregnant NATURALLY with twins! Naturally?! Twins?! Oh my! We were over the moon; in disbelief; excited; scared but mostly, felt so blessed. Sadly one of the twins didn't survive. We believed it was meant to be and less than 8 months later Olivia was born. Our little premie. She was born at 32+ weeks and spent the first 5 weeks of her life in the NICU at the Royal Women's Hospital at Randwick. 

Chloe and Olivia. They are my little ankle biters who I am constantly wrangling with in between work and play. Somedays they drive me crazy, but they also melt my heart. Some days I think of how badly I wanted to be a mum, and how desperately some days I also want a break from the routine of having #2under2. Somedays are hard, some are delightful. One thing I have learned is every day is different, and you need to choose to be positive and calm, even when you feel like you are being pulled in every direction. I love being a mum, but there are days when I envy my husband. He gets to leave the house before they wake up, take a nice bus ride (in silence) to his work and if he wanted could go for a stroll and grab a coffee. He doesn't need to think about strapping on the ergo, getting the pram out for the other, gathering the nappy bag, walking to a cafe, just to get a coffee. Meanwhile, while trying to grab a coffee, Olivia may be screaming and need milk (even though I just fed her), Chloe is talking to her Marshmallow dealer, and I am in the way of a busy cafe trying to remain calm. Motherhood. It ain't easy. I fail somedays and triumph others. But it is BEAUTIFUL.  

"Motherhood. It ain't easy. I fail somedays and triumph others. But it is BEAUTIFUL."

- Amy Iles Goller

2. What is the most difficult/challenging thing you had to deal with in your mama-hood journey?

I would have to say the most challenging aspect of my life as a mum is managing my Fibromyalgia. I chose this photo for my feature, as I look like a normal, healthy, possibly fit mum. But on the inside my central nervous system malfunctions and it is one of those “invisible diseases”, that is known of by specialists but to many unheard of. I live in chronic pain, but I do have relief from medication and lifestyle. But on the days where the pain is so bad, you can barely move, those are the days that I find hard. I cry for myself. I cry for my girls as I want to be more playful but on those days I cant. Finding the balance to manage my pain, be the best mum and wife I can, try to find 'balance' and being a small business owner is the most difficult and challenging aspect of my life. 

I have had Fibromyalgia for 13 years now, and while it is the most difficult thing I have ever had to go through, I realise what true happiness is. It took sadness, pain, loss for me to know happiness. Happiness for me is just being pain free. I need nothing else apart from my family. And I realise everything is relative too, some people have greater struggles than me and some none at all, but it is all relative. I am thankful for my struggle because without it, I wouldn't have stumbled across my strength. 

"I am thankful for my struggle because without it, I wouldn't have stumbled across my strength"

- Amy IIes Goller

That to compete is a waste of time and all that truly matters in life is being kind and appreciating those that love you and loving them back. I've learnt that you should never judge someone until you have walked in their shoes. I realised I may not have been able to continue a high powered job, I may have spent more days in bed than out of it, in the early years when my disease was undiagnosed, but people supported me. People were there to uplift me. Neurologists didn't give up helping me. My husband met me with my condition and wanted to get to know me. He stood by me, even though it was hard. I realised I am in competition with no one. And that LOVE is all you need. And with love comes laughter in our home.  

Amy Goller_brave mama in my family_heart in box_gift for mum 

3. What is the bravest thing you had to do as a mama?

I think the most brave thing I have done so far as a mum is start up a business. It's brave, not because I did it. But because I do it with intent. A deep desire to make a small difference in those that follow and love my concept of building an online store that isn't just about selling gorgeous clothes to precious little ones. It's about meeting and working with mums and trying to raise awareness for myself and others of issues I thought mums and dads would engage in. In the last 20 weeks I have worked with the Stillbirth Foundation of Australia, PANDA, One Girl and met women on Instagram who have bravely shared their story of domestic violence and abuse with me. Strangers wanting to help me raise awareness. These are the stories I want to tell. Simple stories to. Helping mums with fussy eaters and anything I can think of that might make the smallest difference in their day. 

This is brave for me, as I'm not an expert in starting a start-up, I'm not an expert in blogging or social media and everything is new. But I want to show my girls that you have to try. Try and if you fail, that is more than OK, jump back up and try again. As one day you will realise the sky is the limit. 

"Try and if you fail, that is more than OK, jump back up and try again. As one day you will realise the sky is the limit." 

- Amy Iles Goller

4. Is there another brave mama who inspires you? How has she inspired you?

Many mothers inspire me: 

Mums in general inspire me. Sacrificing your wholeself for another little being is huge and is to be respected and admired, like many things mums do.

Mothers I haven't even met yet I'm sure will inspire me. 

Single mums inspire me. 

Single dads inspire me. 

Mums who have loved and lost inspire me. 

Mums who have lost and keep going and push for change inspire me.

Mums who raise beautiful children inspire me.

My mum: She sacrificed and still would sacrifice everything for my sister and I.  

It really is so hard to think of JUST ONE MUM who inspires me, but the parents Denise and Bruce Morcombe have been in my heart from the day I read their story about the disappearance of their son Daniel in 2003. Since then, I have watched them religiously, as they fought for justice. Not only to keep their son's innocence alive but also to save the lives of other young children through their foundation and their everyday work out and about at hundreds of schools across Australia:

www.danielmorcombe.com.au

The Daniel Morcombe Foundation keeps an ongoing awareness program alive to help protect children, teaching them about personal safety, while keeping the community vigilant on crimes against our children. 

These two parents are testimony that LOVE, HEART, PASSION and DETERMINATION can TRIUMPH OVER EVIL. And I admire Denise as a brave mother and equally her husband/Daniel's Father Bruce. I recently watched them interviewed on 60 minutes and I remember Denise saying how hard it is somedays to go to another school and see Daniels young face on a sign, but she does it. SHE DOES IT. She does it as she is brave and she is teaching our children to be brave and know personal safety and boundaries so this hopefully never happens to another child. They are warriors. And they would say they are normal people. Maybe they think that. I think they are extraordinary people. And this mother inspires me to try and make/create/be involved in positive change. 

 

Amy Goller_brave mama in my family_pict 3

 

5. What would you say to another mama who may be going through similar circumstances?

I would say: you are not alone. All mothers are facing challenges, some greater than others. But everything is relative. So follow your own journey. If you need help, ASK. So many people offered me help when I first had Chloe, as I was in pain a lot and trying to get my fibromyalgia back in a 'comfortable' state, but I thought it was brave to reject the help and handle everything on my own. I've since realised people genuinely want to help and it was more brave to let my family know I was struggling and I'm not wonder woman. I can't manage it all. 

No one mother has all her S#@T together. Don't think you are the only one that forgot the washing you put on yesterday or that mums that look good on the outside feel great on the inside. Smoke and Mirrors? 

Just know you are not alone. We are mums. We have to support each other. #mumssupportingmums has always been my hashtag since day dot. Because sometimes being a mum, a good mum, can be the bravest thing you do. 

"sometimes being a mum, a good mum, can be the bravest thing you do"

-Amy Iles Goller

Being a mum is truly one of the bravest thing you can do. I think motherhood comes with the gift of courage. Press on mamas! Even when some days you feel like everything around you is chaotic. You are doing a beautiful thing. 

You can follow Meng who published this interview at:

Website: http://heartinbox.com

Instagram: @heartinbox https://instagram.com/heartinbox

 

Posted in Fighting Fibromyalgia - My Battle, My IVF Success Story, My Motherhood Journey, My Tiny Wardrobe Press

FEATURE - The Mum Behind the Brand Talks Motherhood and Business

Posted on February 05, 2016 by Amy Goller | 0 comments

This article was published on the 4th of February 2016. It was such an honour to be asked by Kristen and Amy to interview with them and discuss motherhood and business. They are two mums to watch doing great things: inspiring, empowering and connecting women around the world. Happy Reading xx Amy xx 

I married my toy boy husband (wink wink), we are only 18 months apart, at 34 and 35. I have two little girls: Chloe who is 2 and Olivia who is 8 months old, but was born at 33 weeks so she is teeny. 

We dance in the lounge room to dorky tunes (the wiggles), however many times I rock out to MTV with my two year old and try and teach her any move I think is COOL hahahah. We love routine when it comes to bed time for the bubs. My husband and I always eat dinner together and chat about the day. We LOVE the weekends. We play. We laugh. We love each other.

Location? We are lucky enough to live in Coogee in NSW and are definitely “beach people”. Sand in the car (this kills my husband), towels in the boot, random spades under our seats. We have enough beach equipment, shovels, spades, towels, umbrellas, beach chairs that our garage looks like we are already at the beach.

Occupation? Creative Director of My Tiny Wardrobe and a Domestic Engineer (Being a mum, is an occupation in itself). I wanted to find a way to work from home with Chloe and Olivia. I soon realised this was something other mums may want to do to, and i started to think of building a brand of collaborating with other women designers, photographers, website developers who all share a passion for empowering mums and supporting small business.

What has been your main source of inspiration? Having two premie babies and spending many hours and weeks in the NICU, I noticed the nursery walls covered in animal prints. It made me realise that as soon as a child is born, their imagination is ready to absorb everything around them. Colours. Patterns. Textures. Touch.
I noticed siblings running in and out to visit their premie sisters or brothers and realised there are no rules to kids fashion. Little girls twirling around in tutus, skater boy brothers with batman capes on guarding their Tiny siblings. That environment inspired me. In an area where there was so much pain and anxiety, children, design, & colour bought joy to the environment.

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5 favourite things/items? Converse, Peonies (My home is filled with them), Green Tea and Honey (Lots of Honey), My husbands Spinach and Ricotta Cannelloni, Carbs – Bread and Pasta!

What are you most passionate about? Trying to be a #mumssupportingmums type of woman. To empower women through blogging and trying to build a community of mums to help mums in the smallest of ways. To make my children proud that my aim was try to create positive change.

Do you have any hobbies/things you do in your downtime? Downtime? What? Im laughing to myself. Right now I don’t feel like I have much down time. Having two little ones under two years old and starting a new business while trying to sew while they sleep leaves little time. I guess right now you could say I eat, shower (with my two year old) and constantly re-heat my coffee all day long in my downtime hahaha. But designing and collaborating with foundations like PANDA, The Stillbirth Foundation of Australia and publishing blogs through my website is my passion and I find time to do this in the spare moments I have. When I Started my online clothing range, I didn’t do it just to sell gorgeous clothes to tiny humans. I did it to raise awareness of issues I thought mums and dads would engage in. A community is what I wanted to build. So thats what I am achieving in my downtime.

How would you describe your family? A blessing. After years of IVF to have Chloe and the loss of a twin when we had Olivia. A true Blessing.

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I’m a mum with hustle (I’m know all mums are #itsamumslife) and my husband is laid back. Chloe mirrors me & just the mention of the wiggles, sends her into a spin: Literally, dance moves I’ve never seen before. I have to say if I hear the song “Big Red Car” or “Fruit Salad, Yummy, Yummy” one more time, I may go crazee!!!!

Olivia is a little quiet observer, like her dad and less of a social butterfly. This sometimes is a problem, as I think mums in general will get this: there are times when I just want to grab my husband and tell him to hustle; move faster; steam some bottles; place a grocery order; stop watching NBA; cricket is played all Summer so I’m sure you can watch it later! Im laughing writing this, as I think all wives at some point must think this.

How did becoming a mother change you? I think I have learnt to be less anxious. Which may sound odd, considering you have this precious gift who are completely dependent upon you for their emotional and physical needs and support. But I realised the best way to show them love was to worry less about the small superficial stuff (dusting, making sure the washing gets hung out the morning it went on) and spend the time when I’m not working focusing on them.

What’s the best part about being a mother? The LOVE I feel from my girls and the immense, undeniable, intense love I feel for them. Words can not even describe how much love I have for them.

Naming your children is always so difficult (or maybe it was just me!) Was it easy to pick your child’s name and why did choose it? My husband and I agreed that we wanted their names to be pretty and timeless. I think a lot of other mums in 2013 thought this too, as their at 3 children named Chloe in her class at daycare. She goes one day a week. The names Olivia and Chloe were our “Back up names” & thank goodness we had them, because as soon as we saw their face we quickly realised the names we had set in stone were not who their little faces were. So I think sometimes, they determine to a degree the name you will choose once you meet them.

Has your personal style changed since becoming mother? If so how? My personal style has changed. Im all about comfort and practical clothing. Converse have replaced stilettos, jeans have replaced skirts, dresses have been a staple as I feel feminine in them and you can throw it on and be out the door in a heartbeat. Anything that I can wear and still feel feminine, yet be active with my little ones, who are always on the move or wanting to be held, nursed etc.

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Is there anything about motherhood that has surprised you? To be really frank: “It’s BLOODY HARD WORK”. I knew there would be sleepless nights, crying, teething etc. But I didn’t realise that it would be so hard. And I think its hard, because you want to be a great mum. You want to raise a child that is kind, has great manners, and feels secure and SO LOVED. Yet, you need to balance that with discipline, being their teacher, their friend and also their authority figure and role model. It’s a fine balance.

Favourite thing to do as a family? Be outside in the sun playing. It’s the simple things.

What has been the most memorable moment for you in motherhood so far? I now see the beauty in everyday things. I see the innocence they see. The expressions on their face when they see rain for the first time. Watching my two year old play with her sister and make her giggle. The love they share. It’s

What are some baby essentials every new mother needs? Things that are always in my bag: Nappies; swaddles; a baby blanket; wipes; a dummy; a spare outfit/onesie; formula and bottles if you are not breastfeeding. My handbag is a black hole. In time you learn what’s essential for where you are going and what is not crucial to have on hand.

What are some of your favourite shops/websites for baby wear?
@dreamykidz.com.au
@kurokiknitting
@shirleybredal

What is the one thing you want to teach your children? I want them to know that kindness costs nothing and generosity is a privilege.

Have any advice for newly mothers/mothers to be? The saying “It takes a village to raise a child” is true. Don’t be proud or feel guilty to ask for help on the days when things are rough. So many times I have cried to my sister, a friend or my mum. It helps lift the burden on days when things are hard and you may feel overwhelmed. On those days where you feel like you are simple a human dummy. On the days where you forgot that the fridge was empty and you need formula. Or on those sleep deprived days where you can barely function. Don’t try and act like you can do it all. There is no need to be so strong to the detriment of your happiness or your health. Happy mother, happy child. So if someone is offering you help: to bake you a cake, cook you a meal, bath your baby, take your babe for a stroll so you can have a shower or some “you time”, let them help. They are asking because they care. They care about YOU.

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Website: www.thebestgiftoflife.com 
Instagram: @thebestgiftoflife

 

Posted in Business and Motherhood, My Tiny Wardrobe Press

The Truth About Breastfeeding

Posted on February 01, 2016 by Amy Goller | 0 comments

So you have just given birth and with your Midwife’s consent, baby is placed onto your chest for initial skin to skin contact.  That beautiful moment where you lay eyes on your baby for the first time and everything feels oh so surreal.  You feel like you are in a dream, but really you are being consumed by your precious hormones Oxytocin, Adrenaline & Endorphins.  Nothing generally matters at this point except that your baby is healthy and breathing... you know, anything seems to go.  If you found out you pooed yourself – no biggy, I just gave birth, I don’t care anymore.  You can once again thank those above mentioned hormones for that.

Oxytocin, also known as the “LOVE” hormone is peaking at this point.  It has acknowledged that baby has been born and speaks to its best mate ‘Prolactin’ which is your “MILK” hormone and together they initiate the onset of breast attachment and it is now that your breastfeeding journey begins.

Initially, we are all pretty blahzay about this breastfeeding gig.  If baby attaches at birth it’s a bonus and if it doesn’t, well we have plenty of time to establish feeding right?  My baby has just been born and I just want to weigh it, kiss it, cuddle it, dress it and share it around for everyone to cuddle.  Then comes the reality.  It is time for the next feed, just a few hours on from birth.  Baby is sleepy or the complete opposite (totally vigorous) and now I can’t attach it regardless OR just like a dream, baby sucks like a vacuum and it is really easy…for now.

Gradually, you as a new mum become tired, emotional and tender.  You are still on Cloud 9 but everything is a little bit harder now.  Your vagina or caesarean wound is throbbing, your bum feels like you have pushed a bowling ball out of it and really all you want to do is just rest for 5 minutes but you struggle to.  The next visitor arrives, your baby is stirring for its next feed and by now you REALLY need that pain relief you should have buzzed for an hour ago.  Your nipples might be a little sore at this point but I will push on, baby needs a feed and that is important.  I will just try on my own and if baby doesn’t attach I will press the call bell.  Let’s not forget Day 2 when all baby wants to do is stay glued to your breast and the only way we feel it will settle is giving it one litre of milk.  Is this sounding familiar to you?

This is my point and this is the truth about breastfeeding.

It is hard, it is emotional and it is time consuming.  It is tiring and it hurts.  It is meant to be easy but its not and it is meant to be enjoyable but right now you may be doubting this.

My advice – if you really want to breastfeed, if you really want to make it work for you and baby and if you absolutely want to make it an enjoyable experience than push through.  It is as simple as that.  Persevere & Patience is crucial.  Your baby, like yourself is learning and it is really testing at times but it does pay off if you commit 100% to it.  I have found in my time as a Midwife there are women who would give their left leg to breastfeed successfully and other women who can take it or leave it.  And that is fine also.  Of course it is.  We are human and that is only natural.  There is nothing wrong with women who chose not to breastfeed and it is our society that has poorly created this nasty stigma.  What ever happened to us hippy women uniting as one?

If you do want to breastfeed your babe then this is how it goes.  Talk to your Midwife, buzz her EVERY time you need to feed until you are comfortable.  Hound her/him until you are satisfied with your attachment and ensure they are answering your questions.  Truth be told, we can be that run off our feet, if you tell us baby has fed well we take your word for it.  Don’t be embarrassed.. pleaseee don’t be embarrassed, we can’t help you feed if you are attaching baby with your top on.  Believe me, boobs are just meant for feeding to us, not a beauty contest.  They are beautiful no matter how saggy, big, small, hairy, pimply.. you name it we have seen it and WE DON’T CARE!  Write your questions down so you don’t forget to ask us and no question is EVER dumb.  If your nipples are tender, TELL US!!  If your boobs are on fire when we attach baby TELL US!!  If you aren’t enjoying it and finding it difficult and emotional TELL US!! Boy, when those baby blues hit me, I nearly threw my boobs out the window, I had just about enough.

As days go on it gets better.  As your milk comes in it gets easier.  Baby is suddenly happy to feed every 2 hours instead of every half hour (Phew) and you finally feel comfortable that your baby is attached and sucking correctly.  I honestly think it takes a good 6-12 weeks to feel confident breastfeeding and to understand what your baby wants and know your baby is receiving adequate nutrition.  Do not get caught up on the whole (how do I know if my baby has had enough?) scenario.  It is simple.  If your baby has wet nappies every feed, is content (lets be honest some days babies just cry ALL day for no reason), is sleeping a solid 2-4 hour block during the day (newborn stage) and most of all is gaining weight, then that is a sure sign your baby is getting enough milk.  This obviously differs if you have a premature, jaundiced or unwell baby as you may have a strict feeding plan in place.

So Mumma’s – some simple wise words for you.  Back yourself in, trust your instinct, relax and enjoy.  That saying “you reap the rewards” applies to both you and your baby.  It is challenging, but it does get easier.  It does eventually become second nature and most of all, it is not a competition.  Do not worry about your friend that can pump 150ml or the other friend that can confidently breastfeed standing up or the friend that doesn’t have to wear nipple shields.  Do what works for you.  Never be ashamed to ask for help (I still ask my mum and I am a midwife).  I have boobs too that ached, stung and turned into unpleasant concrete balls.  I am a mum remember, we all have crap days where everything seems too hard for now.

We have such a broad support network out there Today, do not be afraid to utilise it.

Last but not least, we can be our own worst enemies.  When you are having a bad day, so are 37 million other new mums with you (that always makes me feel better).  No one is perfect.  Never judge anyone for their decision to breastfeed or not.  Support is key, regardless.  You and your baby’s health is number one – NEVER FORGET THAT.

Amelia xx 

Website: https://themidwifemumma.wordpress.com

Instagram: @themidwifemumma

Instagram: https://instagram.com/themidwifemumma 

Posted in Bottle Feeding is Great, Bottlefeeding, Breastfeeding, Breastfeeding Doesn't Come Naturally To Everyone

One Year Mother-Versary

Posted on January 27, 2016 by Amy Goller | 0 comments

Instagram is such a great concept, don’t you think? It’s a place where a group of complete strangers can become good friends. It allows you to connect with like-minded people without ever having to meet in person. Sharing stories, pictures and musings to this cool little community, which continues to grow and inspire. When Amy recently reached out to me on Instagram to ask if I wanted to guest blog for her, I didn’t have to think twice. I was very humbled that she wanted to include me in her powerful movement of #womensupportingwomen and #mumssupportingmums.

Lessons Learnt in my first year as a mum Blog

This is me and my little Super Man (wink wink) xx

As I've been in this motherhood gig for just over a year now (yay to my one year Mother-versary), I thought it was a nice opportunity to reflect on a few lessons learnt and ones I'm still learning. More for self-reflection than anything else, but if anyone finds these things comforting then that's wonderful!

1. HELP IS NECESSARY

And amazing. Truly, it really is. So often you hear people say "let me know if you need anything" but our pride tells us to say "thanks, but that's ok we'll be fine". Yes, most of the time you will be fine. But when you're not fine, ask or take any help offered to you. Without my partner's help, I would be lost. Without my family's help, I wouldn't have been able to work or join the occasional social event. And without friends (some of whom I didn't even know this time last year) I wouldn't have maintained (most of) my sanity this past year. Even if it’s a quick chat or occasional message, those who care about you and your wellbeing will make themselves known and be there when you need. Just make sure you let them.

2. NOTHING COMES NATURALLY

Well for me it didn't anyway. Before starting this little journey, I'd heard all too often about the overwhelming love, devotion and purpose a baby gives you. It sounded like something out of a movie where your whole life leads up to this one moment in time and then everything makes sense. Breastfeeding is a cinch, life with a baby is a dream and this whole new level of love for your partner becomes apparent. 

WRONG.

It's hard work. I didn't experience the instant connection because there were complications at birth so I didn't get to even hold him until the next day. Breastfeeding was harder than I expected, but we got there. And although I discovered a new love for my partner seeing him as a father, we bickered a lot at first thanks to my exhausted, emotional state. With all of this said and done, is it worth it? Absolutely! But just try not to get swept up in this image of a perfect transition into parenthood because I don't think that ideal is possible. Remember that if you do find things harder than you imagined, it doesn't make you any less of a person or mother.

3. PRACTICE SOME SELF-LOVE

This one I'm still learning. For our whole lives, we are taught that in order to look after or save someone else, we must first take care of ourselves. Take saving someone from drowning for instance - if we forget about ourselves and devote all energy into the other person, chances are we will all drown in the process. This is what it feels like in the very early months. Leading up to birth we are educated about newborn care but the concept of caring for the mother sort of goes out the window. Some days I'd find myself hardly eating or drinking at all, as I prioritised household chores over meals any time bub was napping.

Needless to say, this left me teetering on the brink of a complete breakdown. Time to put Mumma first (when you can) and let chores wait a while. It took a few months to find a hobby I could do, but I ended up taking weekly ballet classes. Even if it's just an hour out of the house, it felt amazing and really helped my mood, energy levels and confidence.

 Motherhood and How to Find a Balance Blog

4. NO JUDGEMENT

This was a big eye-opener for me as any previous parenting ideas I had, have gone completely out the window. I'm actually ashamed of the judgement I used to have for people I didn't even know. If the old me saw a parent struggling with a public toddler tantrum, I would've shook my head and questioned their parenting style. Now if the new me saw that exact situation occurring, I'd feel like running over to give the mother/father a hug and whip out a kettle so we can sit down to have a cup of tea and chat (because tea solves everything, right?) Unless you've walked in someone's shoes, it's never ok to judge anyone, ever!

Blogging about Lessons Learnt in the first year of motherhood

Some people think that the second they have a baby, they become an expert on ALL babies and parenting in general and they aren't afraid to openly judge others. If you have anybody like this in your life, swiftly remove yourself from that friendship circle. This type of judgement or negativity can be really toxic and leads to unnecessary insecurities. Trust in your instincts and surround yourself with positive people.

5. FINDING PURPOSE

This is another one I'm still learning. Some people find purpose in their careers while others find purpose in motherhood. I feel like I need a purpose just for myself. Something that gets me out of bed each morning feeling energised and motivated. Something to work towards or grow. Something that will remain with me when my kid/s have grown up and flown the nest. And most importantly, something that I can look back on when I'm old and grey and feel really proud of myself for achieving. So what is this illusive 'thing' that will give me purpose in life? No clue. But I'm working on finding it.

Mummy Blogging for My Tiny Wardrobe boutique Fashion Store

Deonie x

Instagram – otherthanamother

Blog – otherthanamother.wordpress.com

Email – otherthanamother@outlook.com

 

Posted in Celebrating One Year as a Mother, Finding Purpose As a Mum, Lessons Learned from A New Mum, Not Everything Comes Naturally as a Mother

Silent Reflux = Screaming Baby

Posted on January 20, 2016 by Amy Goller | 0 comments

As Amy has mentioned I am a working mum of two. My first child, Hudson was born six weeks early.  Since his sucking reflex wasn’t developed he had a feeding tube when  he was in the special care nursery, like many premature babies do. 

Silent Reflux in Premie Babies Blog

A few weeks after he was born he came home from the hospital and was breastfed and bottle fed as he got quite tired from breastfeeding alone.  After about a week at home we noticed he was crying a lot. Especially after feeds. I mentioned it to my health nurse, she asked if her was vomiting (he wasn’t) she said it was normal newborn  behaviour and I didn’t think much of it.

That was until my darling newborn  began to SCREAM ALL DAY and ALL NIGHT.  Going anywhere in the car was like a screaming marathon and I was at my wits end. I mentioned it to people and everyone said ‘babies cry you know’, ‘he is a newborn’. I think they assumed I was over exaggerating, just a new mum who was freaking out when my baby cried or I was unable to settle my child. The third statement was true. Neither  myself or my husband could settle Hudson and this screaming went on for a few weeks as we had no idea what was wrong.

Silent Reflux In Newborns Blog

 

Looking back now I have had a second baby, it was clear something was wrong. But as new, very sleep deprived parents and no normal signs of reflux (projectile vomiting etc). We just thought we had a difficult baby and I thought I wasn’t cut out for the whole motherhood gig. One of the most hurtful things that was said to me when I was describing that I was unable to settle Hudson to another mother and she said ‘ohhh really, well I’m sure I could settle him’. I felt helpless, I was loosing my mind and the constant screaming was awful. We tried a number of different settling techniques, placing the cot on an angle, colic remedy and nothing worked.  He was gaining weight and still no projectile vomitting so my health nurse said there was no worry. She suggested he may have had days and nights confused?? If that was the case he never thought it was night time!

One day I was on the phone to my mum and she could  hear Hudson screaming  his lungs out. She said it definitely  sounded like a pain cry and I should go to the  doctor.  That evening Hudson  was still going at 11pm, we packed up and went straight to the Children’s Hospital. A doctor took one look at him crying, red in the face, wriggling around and said it was silent reflux (basically severe heartburn). He didn’t vomit but the acid was causing incredible pain. 

That week we were referred to a pediatrician and he was put on Losec and thickened formula. It took a few days to start working but the difference in Hudson was amazing. The crying stopped and for the first time since he was home we slept for longer than half an hour straight. The dosage was increased as he gained weight, there wasn’t any further reflux problems and we weaned him off Losec just before his first birthday. 

Reflux and Gerd In Newborn Babies Blog

Apparently reflux is common with prem babies because of the feeding tube, no one had mentioned this and I had never even heard of ‘silent reflux’. Let me tell you, it was the opposite of silent, they need to rethink the name.

From the start my instinct told me something was wrong. Yet, I doubted  myself. Never doubt, if you think  something is wrong, follow it up. Get a second opinion and never let anyone put you down for doing it. If I didn’t  listen to everyone just making me feel I was a silly new mum I could have got Hudson help earlier and saved a lot of sleepless nights and heartache.

Rachelle xx

Instagram: @themummycode

Web: www.themummycode.com.au

Resources I had found helpful with Olivia:

http://www.reflux.org.au/

Amy xx 

 

Posted in Premature Babies and Reflux, Silent Reflux

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